Samstag, 27. Oktober 2007
Pum
I don't know what to do now. I'm not really sure whether my host family in Hannover knows I'm coming to see them and that I'm gonna stay the whole week at their place. Shit. I don't wanna go there like "hey, look who's back". I think it wouldn't be a problem with Martina (host mom) and Lena (host sister, 17 years old) but my host dad Wolfgang wouldn't like it. He won't. He hates me. Or maybe he doesn't hate me but he doesn't like me, we were never that close. After that whole fucking year I spent in his home he just shook hands with me and said "tschüß". That really hurt me. At the beginning of the year I really thought he's just shy and I really thought I'd get to know him a little better but it never got better and we actually never talked with each other. He only talked to me when I had done something wrong or I had to pay the phone bill. I think I was just a nightmare to him cause I'm always so messed up and I never do anything in time and I tend to act quite spontaniously. And I talk and laugh loud and I love doing new stuff, meeting new people and those things make me the opposite of him. Even if he liked me just a little, he'd never show or tell me that. I don't understand how someone can be such an.. unemotional person. So cold.
Tomorrow I'll write them but I still don't know whether it's better if I write to Martina instead of Wolfgang. It just feels like a bad idea to tell Wolfgang in a mail that I'm coming in 1,5 weeks. :D He'd just get an heart attack or something. :D

Oh man I don't know. I really need to do something about this.

... comment